Selling Your Sole – The Truth About Selling Shoes To Fetishists

First off, a disclaimer of sorts. I am a grown woman who knew exactly what I was doing. I knew no woman in her right mind would buy a trashed shoe on eBay and there was only one type of person who would want them. And I knew what they would be doing with them. So, now, let’s proceed with the story.

My step-son, Kenny, has his own eBay shop. He sells everything, from DVDs to collectable coins and bank notes to…anything really! One time Kenny and his wife told me a story about what happened when they sold a pair of old shoes. They immediately got a message from someone who asked if the shoes smelled. Their reply was something like the shoes were in wearable condition and cleaned to meet eBay regulations. The potential buyer lost interest. He only wanted them if they smelled. We all had a good laugh and that was that.

foot fetish selling shoes online dominatrix

Fast forward to 2017. I am broke. I have no income, raging sciatica and a bag full of pretty shoes I’ll probably never wear again thanks to their skyscraper heels. My Carers Allowance has been withheld for most of 2017 and I only got paid four days before Christmas. I am scared about the future and whether we can continue to make ends meet. I’ve heard plenty of stories about women making money online through selling their trashed shoes (see this article and this forum thread) so I seriously consider jumping on the bandwagon and listing my “well-worn shoes” on eBay, even though none of them have been worn that often (I live in Dr Martens) and I’m pretty sure they smell alright. It’s just an idea until one night I get a message from an account on Twitter with a default profile pic. A man called Chris Smith randomly gets in touch and asks if I will sell him my shoes. He says he’ll pay a lot of money.  I say I’ll think about it.

I asked myself a lot of questions. How will the money be exchanged? How much can I make? Does the buyer get my address? How will my husband feel about it? What if this person is involved in a violent crime and leaves my shoes and DNA at the scene? Ok, so maybe it’s just me who thinks along those lines but it’s a valid question nevertheless. The most important question is, how will I feel about myself if I do this? I’m pretty open-minded. I don’t judge other people’s sexual preferences but I did once make one of my characters obsessed with feet because I wanted to make him less sexy in my head. It worked.

I needed answers to my questions, so I talked it over with my husband. Then I investigated Chris online, my potential buyer, and saw that he had been making payments to a dominatrix on Twitter and all he wanted in return for these payments was to be told how pathetic he was. I’m sitting there gobsmacked as I read through her Twitter feed. Surely this stuff only happens in bad 1980s pornos? Well, apparently not. It happens on Twitter in 2018 and is there for all the world to see.

I told Chris I would sell him the manky old slippers I was about to throw away. I’d decided £50 was fine. All he had to do was send me the money and his address and I’d post them out, in a zip-lock bag to retain any scent, even though they don’t actually smell too bad. He vanished from Twitter, having been reported by someone. Neither I, nor the dominatrix, were impressed. Since my private sale had fallen through, I took the idea to eBay instead.

foot fetish selling shoes online dominatrix

This is where it gets both amusing and disgusting. My own opinion varies depending on what mood I’m in. I listed slippers, boots and stilettos. And just for a laugh, a pair of manky old tights with several snags in the legs. I wanted to see what I could get away with. Within a few minutes, my views for each item were into double figures. Within an hour, my inbox was full of messages to answer. The watch count for them was rising. I was satisfied that this was going to be profitable and got to work on answering the messages.

Now, the description for each item, after describing the size, colour, type etc, went something like, “well-worn, will be cleaned to meet eBay regulations before sending, any questions please ask.” So there wasn’t really a lot to ask me, you’d think. Except, they always found yet another question, yet another way of continuing the dialogue. And when they’d asked everything they could about the product, they either started chatting and trying to get to know me or they started the dirty talk – which obviously earned them a deaf ear.

One chap gave me his email address. He asked me if the boots would be cleaned before sending. Sensing he didn’t want them cleaned, I said that was up to him. His response was, “I’d love to be told to do that myself.” I passed my phone to my husband and asked him how I should respond. I’ve never seen Alex make the face he did then, which was somewhere between a cringe and a giggle. He didn’t give me any guidance on the matter so my response was, “Well, make sure you’re the highest bidder or I won’t be telling you to do anything.” He wasn’t, by the way. He didn’t bid at all.

I was inundated with requests for pictures of my feet which I declined. I was asked if I would be selling panties or socks or stockings. And then one man actually pushed me over the edge. It was then that I decided this wasn’t a laugh any more and I was getting seriously pissed off.

Buyer: Do you do anything with them before selling?

Me: They’ll be cleaned to meet eBay’s regulations before selling as stated in the description.

Buyer: Do you do anything else with them?

Me: I’ll place them in a zip-lock bag to prevent damage in transit.

Buyer: Anything else?

Me: Well, what do you want me to do with them?

Buyer: I want you to make them wet.

Me: *sits there, for a moment naively thinking that if I wash them they’ll get wet, but that means they’ll be heavier and I’ll have to bump up the postage before sending – then realise that he means he wants them smeared in vaginal fluids*

Me: You’ll have to do that yourself.

So, contrary to what you read in the press, this is basically what happens when you try to sell shoes online. Despite receiving lots of small bids, I was unlikely to make more than a tenner on anything so I removed all but a pair of Dr Marten heels before the end of the auction. I let them run until the end and sold them to a very formal and appropriate man in Ipswich who described them in his positive feedback as a “lovely purchase.” To make more than a few quid, I suspect I would have had to court the fetishists and lead them on. There would have to be pictures of feet exchanged, engagement in dirty talk and bodily fluids smeared on the shoes.

foot fetish selling shoes online dominatrix

My own experience makes me question the validity of the stories I’ve read online, apparently written by women who have sold their own shoes and made a good living doing it, or at least enough pocket money to make it worthwhile. I don’t think they’re true. Either that, or they’ve got some really sexy bunions going on. I did have a brief but pleasant exchange of messages with a man who was interested in buying tights. When I removed them he was disappointed and I explained my reasons for backing out. He admitted that not a lot of women sell their shoes online so when a new seller comes on the scene, men all want to get to know them. He then explained that most of these men aren’t willing to pay much and are more interested in trying to get the women to talk dirty.

So, for anyone who is broke and thinking of selling their shoes, by all means go ahead, but be aware that you will not be making that much money and you’re expected to do a lot to earn it, perhaps more than you’re willing to do. It sounds like money for old rope and the women who write about it online will have you believe that it’s easy cash, but, in short, they’re lying.

The 10-A-Day For A Month Challenge: The Outcome

Back in August of this year, I undertook a challenge to eat 10 portions of fruits or vegetables a day for a month. I did promise back then that I would update you all on how it went. So, here’s what I discovered happening to me and my body following that challenge to eat more fruits and vegetables. The results were surprising!

The first thing I noticed was an emotional shift. I didn’t cut anything out at all. I simply added more nutrients and raw fruits and vegetables. For the first two or three days, I was feeling this kind of rage that I haven’t experienced in a long time. It was like the worst PMT of my life. I also suffered some blinding headaches. I must stress again that I cut nothing out. I don’t drink any caffeinated drinks anyway, so that made no difference. I only added to my diet. FYI, I usually eat between 2-7 portions a day. Most days it’s on the lower end of the scale, but there are days when it’s higher.

10 a day fruit and vegetables

The next thing I noticed was around day four or five. My eczema, which has been well under control for the last five years, returned with fury. You could say this was a total coincidence, but it went away again when I went back to a normal diet and hasn’t returned.

Around day seven, my physiotherapist remarked that I looked like I had lost weight. My husband made a similar comment. I was delighted. So, I weighed myself but to my absolute horror, I had gained three pounds (which I am still trying to lose again). I measured myself with a tape measure and found that my waistline had decreased by around an inch, yet my weight had gone up. I can’t explain that one.

5 a day orange juice 10 a day fruits vegetables

By the end of the second week, I had death breath, terrible indigestion and was very irritable. I couldn’t sleep for a full night. My sciatica was causing me more and more problems and I was suffering from terrible leg cramps. My depression was worsening and I was tearful. In fact, every time I drank a green smoothie (two handfuls of spinach, a whole peach, half a can of mandarins and three tablespoons of fat free natural Greek yogurt) I felt very nauseous. Could there be such a thing as too much nutrition?

I returned my diet to normal early. I couldn’t last the whole month. I did find myself naturally turning away from refined sugars when I was on the challenge and eating less chocolate but I didn’t feel healthier in any way. In fact, I felt pretty grouchy. And the death breath was just gross. I’d like to know if I had continued would these mood swings have gone away but when it was affecting my emotional health in such a way, I didn’t really want to take the risk of finding out.

soup vegetables 10 a day

So, my conclusion after this experience is that yes, there is such a thing as too much nutrition. Everybody’s body is different. Those who say you should up your fruit and vegetable intake and cut out refined sugar are not living in your body. They don’t have your metabolism. They have a different lifestyle and motivation and I believe moderation in everything is the healthiest way to live. I know this is a controversial viewpoint as many people who read this post will be devoted to a healthy lifestyle and it’s quite trendy these days to shun sugar in favour of raw foods. But here’s the thing. The most toxic thing for your health isn’t sugar, it’s sadness. And if eating all that fruit and veg is going to make me feel sad, I’d really rather not. What are your own thoughts on this?

hot chocolate

Nude Jewellery – It’s All You Need To Wear

Jewellery can be very powerful. It makes a statement about who you are, who you love and how you want others to see you. It makes sense to take care when choosing a piece for yourself or someone else since they will potentially wear it more often than they wear any item of clothing. That’s why it’s surprising to think that something that is basically an extension of ourselves and our personalities is so often made in bulk and sold in chain stores.

nude jewellery bespoke custom made engagement rings wedding

That’s why when I found Nude Jewellery I knew I had to reach out and request to work with them. Established in 2001, they are a London-based independent jewellers who specialise in unique, quirky, contemporary jewellery and craft their products from high-quality materials. I received a gratuity from them but all opinions are my own (come on, you know nobody tells me what to write!) and I received no monetary compensation for this post.

What really appeals to me about Nude Jewellery is that it’s all handcrafted. The independent designers within the business have their own unique style and this shows in the variety of products they produce. They offer both ready-to-wear products and a bespoke design service, which I’ll talk about in a bit more detail later. Obviously since I’m in the Glasgow area it’s difficult for me to get down to their boutique so I’ve had to form an opinion based on their website, the product I’ve tried and my interactions with owner, Nikki Galloway.

nude jewellery bespoke custom made engagement rings wedding

The range they offer is wide and includes, necklaces, earrings, bracelets, cufflinks, rings and ankle chains. You can choose from products crafted in silver, platinum and gold, including yellow, white and rose varieties. Their engagement ring section had me gazing at the screen with heart-eyes. Here, there’s a stunning range of different styles and materials, so whatever your taste is, you will find something that will fit. I liked the fact that there were so many unusual designs, displayed side-by-side with the more classic styles. The gemstones were varied too. The chocolate diamonds and pink sapphires are my new favourite things. Sadly, I’ve never owned either of these so perhaps next birthday I’ll ask for something with a chocolate diamond!

I was immediately drawn to the bespoke engagement ring service. I really believe that every engagement ring should be especially made for the bride-to-be. Our relationships with our future husbands are unique and personal, so shouldn’t the jewellery that tells the world we love them be the same? It doesn’t matter that I’ve been married for nearly thirteen years. I still love looking at rings and for me, the edgier they are the better. As someone who owns a quirky, unique engagement ring (although not from Nude Jewellery) I can tell you that it’s totally worth choosing something that isn’t the norm. People’s reactions when they see your choice are priceless. Of course, a traditional sparkling solitaire is gorgeous and elegant but I like something with individuality. These items are going to elicit an emotional response every time you look at them, so you have to be sure that you’ve got it right and you are investing in something of quality that you’re going to always love. And let’s be honest. Engagement rings aren’t cheap. You can’t risk wasting money on something you’re lukewarm about. The best way to ensure that you’ll always love it is to design your own ring. The best thing about this is, they can also do custom made wedding bands to fit the engagement ring. If you’re looking for a unique, designer, handmade engagement ring, but having a bespoke product isn’t a big deal for you, they have plenty to choose from in a ready to wear range too.

If I was choosing a bespoke jewellery designer in the UK, I think Nude Jewellery would be my first port of call. The owner, Nikki Galloway is an award-winning jeweller with several exclusive jewellery ranges under her belt. She has designed for red carpet events and the Sultan of Brunei. If you choose Nude Jewellery, you’re dealing with a glamorous boutique firm who I can confirm from my dealings with them aren’t at all stuffy. Nikki was approachable and unreserved.

nude jewellery bespoke custom made engagement rings wedding

Now, I want to talk about the vintage-inspired item I’m reviewing. It’s a small Art Deco style silver pendant. To me, Art Deco is synonymous with the classy, confident, forward-thinking flappers of the 1920s and the geometric styles really appeal to me. It’s a style that will always look elegant and since the 2020s are just around the corner, I’m feeling inspired to add lots of Art Deco pieces to my wardrobe and jewellery box.

nude jewellery bespoke custom made engagement rings wedding

The necklace arrived in a gorgeous silver box, tied with a grey satin ribbon. There was a “Nude” brand charm attached, which I thought was a really elegant way to brand the package. Inside, under some protective white tissue paper, the pendant was housed in a black and silver box with the Nude logo on the lid. The chain is 16″ long because I’m quite petite and can’t carry off a longer chain than that but there’s also an 18″ chain available. The chain itself is sturdy and as with all Nude Jewellery products, the timeless Art Deco pendant is handcrafted.

I completely fell in love with this pendant. For a long time I’ve been wearing costume jewellery and now that I’m going for a change in style and trying to step up the quality of the products I wear, this is going to become one of my staple items. I like that it could easily be worn everyday with jeans and not look out of place but it can also finish off a party outfit, especially at this time of year when a bit of sparkle is required! The chain was comfortable, the pendant didn’t feel heavy at all and I got lots of compliments when I started wearing it. It must be eye-catching!

nude jewellery bespoke custom made engagement rings wedding

 

If you would like to check out this pendant or find out more about Nude Jewellery, you can visit their website or check them out on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter.

Chocolate Free In 2018!

One of the things on my 40 Before 40 List is doing a chocolate fast for charity. I think it’s about time I stop talking about it and just do it. That’s why I am giving up chocolate in 2018 for the National Autistic Society.

It’s been two years now since my gorgeous wee boy Luke was diagnosed with autism. It’s been full of ups and downs but ultimately the diagnosis has been a positive step and has helped us to move forward, get some much needed support and to plan for our future.

leadhills railway glengonnar review

The National Autistic Society have been an invaluable source of support for us. Because of their advice we’re financially better off and their support gave us the strength to fight to have Luke placed in a special unit within a mainstream school that specialises in educating children with communication difficulties, where he is thriving. I want to give something back to say thank you for their help. So, I am doing a chocolate fast during 2018!
Anyone who knows me knows what a sugar addict I am so this will be a real challenge. I spend roughly £100 a month on chocolate and chocolate flavoured products. I am hoping to raise £1 per day during the year. Luke is going to be a great source of support in this challenge as he HATES chocolate and will help me stay on the wagon.
Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving – they’ll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity. So it’s the most efficient way to donate – saving time and cutting costs for the charity.
hot chocolate
I am pinching the golden ticket idea from the Go Sober For October campaign and each time someone donates £15 or more, I can have a cheat day or “golden ticket day.” If I don’t get enough £15 donations in time, I don’t get the cheat day.
GOLDEN TICKET DAYS:
14 February, 21 February, 11 March, 30 March, 1 April, 23 May, 11 June, 25 July, 26 July, 31 October, 30 November, 24 December, 25 December, 26 December, 31 December.
If you would like to read more about my fundraising or make a donation you can do so by visiting my Just Giving Page.

Free Today: Leger’s Sidekick by Lacey Dearie

From today, 2nd December 2017 until Wednesday 6th December 2017 my book, Leger’s Sidekick will be free to download from Amazon. Released in March 2014, this book was dedicated to my pet snails, Gonzales and Leopold, who tragically died on the day of the launch.

leger's sidekick lacey dearie cat sleuth e-book cozy mystery

You can download this e-book by clicking on the links below and if you love it, I would be delighted if you left a short review.

Amazon US

Amazon UK

Six Years As An Indie Author And Still Learning

I’ve been doing this for a while now. I’ve been writing since 2002, making money from it since 2004, blogging since 2005 and self-publishing since 2011. It was 30th November 2011 that I hit publish on The Tangled Web and I knew as I clicked that button that my life would never be the same. I like to reflect every year on St. Andrews Day and since I’ve been tidying up my blogging presence and moving old posts over to RockPaperSpirit, I thought I’d share a paragraph from one I’ve now deleted. It’s from Hogmanay 2011 and I was proudly listing all I had achieved in my first month as an indie author. It makes amusing reading for me now.

tangled web lacey dearie

“In four weeks, as Lacey Dearie, I’ve had viewers from 14 countries, (Russia bizarrely being the biggest viewer!), 359 total viewers (all genuine, none of them were me) and I’ve now got 384 Twitter followers.  I’ve sold 16 books (ok, one was me) and received five 5* reviews on Amazon.”

I dreamed of number 1 chart positions, lengthy portfolios, connecting with readers and writers from all over the world, doing radio interviews and book signings, quitting the day job and telling people my occupation is “writer.” It all happened. Not quite as I had imagined, not always with me smiling as I ticked off those achievements and quite often with a few tears, but it happened. I believed it would and I made my dreams come true.

lacey dearie tangled web

This year has been one of my most difficult. Sales have been poor, I’ve been writing under a new pseudonym just for my own amusement and I’ve been doing  a lot of soul searching, wondering if I have a future as Lacey. The answer is yes. I can’t see my future as anyone else now and in the next year, I plan to just keep going. It doesn’t matter what I achieve or whether the work I do is successful or fails. I just plan to keep moving forward.

As an old hand at this now, if someone asks me about being an indie author, my one piece of advice is keep going. That’s the difference between those of us who become established and those who just float around. Notice I’m not saying anything about success or wealth, because both those things have eluded me! But yeah, keep going. Build a reputation, write lots, talk to everyone and take the rough with the smooth. Because there will be bad days. So many bad days, so many disappointments and so many critics and doubters. But keep going.

World’s Top 50 Best Beaches 2017 – Is Your Favourite Here?

It’s a long time since I’ve travel blogged and it all feels like unfamiliar territory to me at the moment but thankfully, the blogging community is welcoming and there’s room for everyone to dip into a different niche whenever they’re ready. Recently, I was approached by Flight Network and asked to be part of their judging panel for a campaign they’re running about the World’s 50 Best Beaches.

world's 50 best beaches palm trees fantasy beach

I was asked to contribute three of my favourites and it really got me thinking. Which beaches do I consider the best in the world? More importantly, why do I consider them the best? It’s all very subjective, and what one person considers special will not necessarily float anyone else’s boat. That’s why it’s always good to check lists like these and see what those who love to travel have said. You can’t always rely on guide books like Lonely Planet as they won’t be written with YOU in mind. For example, someone might say Bora Bora has the world’s best beach, but they’re a brave, single, student with no ties and the world at their feet. If you’re a mother who is always broke, are a full-time carer to an autistic child, in Scotland and two thirds of your family are allergic to everything, this beach is not only out of your reach, it’s depressing to think about because I know I’ll never get there.

world's 50 best beaches palm trees fantasy beach bora bora

Unfortunately, none of my contributions made the top 50 list. If you’d like to see what did make the top 50 for 2017, you can click this link and find out! There were quite a few surprises on there. However, if you’d like to know what I personally consider to be the three areas with the best beaches in the world, read on.

Outer Hebrides, Scotland

Secluded, wild and pristine powder-white sands. On a summer’s day this is idyllic. In winter, it’s dramatic and breathtaking. The best thing about this beach? It’s in my home country and is just a couple of trains and a ferry away.

vatersay world's 50 best beaches palm trees fantasy beach

Petra tou Romiou, Paphos, Cyprus

I love this beach so much, it a picture of it made it to the cover of my debut novel and part of the book was set there. This is a shingle beach, and not the most comfortable for walking or sunbathing, but the legend surrounding it more than makes up for that. The fabled birthplace of the Goddess Aphrodite has year-round sunshine, crystal-clear water and if you swim around the rock three times, you will apparently meet the love of your life soon after.

Sardinia

It’s been a long time since I visited this beach but it’s one that stuck in my mind because it ticked all the boxes. Beautiful golden sand, aquamarine water, a gorgeous climate and glamorous sunbathers. If I’d been single I might have mentioned the lifeguards… I’ll leave that to your imagination though.

sardinia world's 50 best beaches palm trees fantasy beach

A full list of the judging panel is available here. What are your favourite beaches?

Free Today: Leger’s Gift by Lacey Dearie

Time for another freebie? I think so! From today, 27th November 2017, until 1st December 2017, Leger’s Gift will be free. Originally published on 30th December 2013, this is a seasonal tale and the fifth in the series. It started out as a Christmas story but as I was writing it, it felt more like a Hogmanay story and since all my books have a very Scottish theme, I let it happen. There really aren’t enough Hogmanay books in the world!
lacey dearie leger's gift free amazon hogmanay scottish black cat

You can download Leger’s Gift for free by clicking on this link and if you’re a Kindle Unlimited member, it is always free.

Free Today: Leger’s Eyes by Lacey Dearie

Next in this round of freebies is Leger’s Eyes, which was the first Halloween cat sleuth story I wrote, the second being Leger’s Ghost which was released earlier this year. Leger’s Eyes is going to be free from today, Wednesday 22nd November 2017 through to Sunday 26th November 2017, after which time it will go back to its original price of $1 or the equivalent in your local currency. It’s also available in paperback, but unfortunately that price won’t be discounted.

leger's eyes lacey dearie halloween cat sleuth cozy mystery

You can download it on Amazon now by clicking on this link.

Free Today: Leger Cat Sleuth by Lacey Dearie

For the next three months, at least one of my books will be free every day. Today I am starting this round of promotional freebies with the first of the Leger series, Leger: Cat Sleuth.

Originally released in June 2013, this is without a doubt, my most popular book to date and from now until Tuesday 21st November 2017, this will be free all over the world. Grab it while you can!

You can download this ebook on Amazon.com or your local Amazon store. It’s also available as a paperback and in audiobook format, narrated by Chris Bland.

leger cat sleuth lacey dearie